My First Tattoo Was A Disaster (Epic Fail)

  • Published on:  12/28/2018

    This is George. Recently he got his first tattoo, and it turned out to be a disaster...but let’s start from the beginning!

    Since he was 14 years old, George dreamed of having a tattoo. In fact, he loved how people covered in tattoos looked. They were so cool, and it was also a way to express themselves by having real art on their body. He couldn’t wait to finally get his first tattoo. He had already decided that it should be an image of a wolf, because they were the animals that perfectly reflected his inner self – they were proud, majestic and loyal animals.

    The only problem was that he had to be 18 or have permission from his parents to get one. So he decided to ask for it as a gift for his 16th birthday. When he did so, both of them started to ask questions like: “Why do you need to ruin your body?”, “Are you doing this for a girl?”; “You realize that this is for life?” He tried to persuade them, but they still said no, adding that once he turned 18 he could do whatever he wanted.

    But he couldn’t wait, because in his mind, he already had a tattoo of a beautiful wolf. But sure, George gets it – his parents are from another generation, and it’s not the same for them. So he had to come up with a new plan. First of all, his tattoo had to be on his back so they wouldn’t notice it, and also it had to be relatively small. Second, he had to find someone who would be willing to give him a tattoo at home. It would also be cheaper than going to a tattoo parlor.

    He asked around, and eventually found this dude who was an amateur tattoo master. He can’t reveal his real name, but let’s call him Bill. They texted each other, and Bill said that he had an entire kit for tattoos and it was perfectly safe, because he was always very cautious. Moreover, he said that it would be much cheaper because he was still learning.

    So he went to his place and he was a bit...weird. He kept talking about how good he was, although before he had said that he was only a beginner, and there was something off about him; like, you could say that he wasn’t genuine in some ways. Honestly, George felt had to cancel it then and there, but he was so excited, so instead he thought: “what could go wrong”?

    Well, as it turned out, a lot could go wrong. Since it was on his back, George couldn’t see what Bill was doing, but from time to time he would say “oops” or something like that. That’s not something you want to hear from your tattoo master.... After a few hours, he said they were finished for today, and he would continue some other time. George looked in the mirror was horrible! The wolf’s eyes were too far from each other, the snout was too long, and overall it was kind of crooked. George got angry, and started arguing with him, like “what is that, it doesn’t look like it should!” But Bill brushed it off, saying that it was alright, he would fix it later, and that it wasn't a big deal. He asked when he could come to finish the tattoo, but George said “no thanks” and stormed off. He still had to pay him, though.

    His friends made fun of George for a long time, and he had to be very cautious during gym class to make sure that nobody saw his terrible tattoo. But people still noticed it and told all the others, so everyone was constantly laughing at him. It was very embarrassing for George, and he tried to explain the situation, but they didn’t care. Moreover, it was very uncomfortable trying to take care of it, because it was on his back...

    But most importantly, he had to hide it from his parents, because he knew they would be so angry at him. He did his best for several weeks, but eventually his dad walked into his room looking for something. George was changing shirts right at that moment, and he noticed the “wolf”. He asked: “what is THAT?!” and well, the only thing he could do was to come clean to him and his mom. George explained the whole thing to both of them, and they were silent the whole time, trying to look strict, but when he finished they couldn’t contain themselves and started laughing!

    George was actually relieved, because it was better than them being angry at him. He asked if they could give him money so he could fix it, so at least it would look better. Through their laughter they said, “no, let it be a reminder of what happens when you don’t listen to your parents”. Eventually he got used to his “crooked wolf” and even started to like it. When his friends or his parents made fun of it, he also made fun of himself, so eventually they forgot about it.

    Now, George wears his first tattoo as a reminder of the need to be more cautious in the future, and to not get a tattoo done at some shady guy’s place. He will fix it when he turns 18, but until then, he has to live with it!

    Music by Epidemic Sound: